Obit

Carolin Fay Cameron

On Saturday, March 3, 2007 at the age of 39 years, our sister, friend and guiding light ended her fierce battle with cancer.

Carolin was born in Edmonton, AB in June 19, 1967, growing up with her father John, her mother Linda and her sister Jolynn. She enjoyed a wonderful life in Edmonton. She attended Northern Alberta Institute of Technology and became an accountant, a profession that suited her love of details. She spent many years working for Interprovincial Pipe Lines/Enbridge, where she and Sandy met. Their daughter Jessica was born in Calgary in 1998. Carolin lived her life the way she wanted to live it. She was very active but her passion was for scrapbooking. She was beloved by many and was one of the most determined and positive people we will ever know. We will miss her resounding spirit and her sharp sense of humour.

Carolin is survived by her husband Sandy Cameron; daughter Jessica Cameron; father John Hebein and his wife Gail, of Edmonton; and her sister Jolynn Rodriguez, of San Francisco. She is also survived by many aunts, uncles and cousins in Canada, the United States, Austria and Switzerland. Carolin was predeceased by her mother Linda Hebein. Carolin was surrounded by her wonderful friends and neighbours: Colette, Karen, Julie, Max, Michelle and a host of others. Thank you for your constant care, concern, insights, and love. The family would like also to thank Dr. Nancy McPhee, Dr. Marc Webster and the staff of the Tom Baker Cancer Centre for the outstanding care given to Carolin during her illness.

Funeral Services will be held at St. Peter's Catholic Church (541 Silvergrove Drive N.W.) on Thursday, March 8, 2007 at 1:30 p.m. Graveside Service to follow at Queen's Park Cemetery. Forward condolences through carolin.blogspot.com. If friends so desire, memorial tributes may be made directly to the Alberta Breast Cancer Foundation (supporting participants in the Weekend to End Breast Cancer, www.endcancer.ca), 13160 - 118 Avenue, Edmonton, AB T5L 2L5.

Arrangements

Carolin's funeral will be Thursday March 8 at 1:30 pm at St. Peters Church in Calgary (541 Silvergrove Drive NW). Graveside Service to follow at Queens Park Cemetery. After that there will be an informal reception back at the church. Best guess is that it will be done by 4:30-5PM. These details and more will appear in the obituary that will run in Calgary and Edmonton papers starting tomorrow.(Late note - Edmonton's cut-off was missed. It'll appear on Wednesday.)



People are encouraged to write their remembrances of Carolin and comments in this blog.

Carolin's pain is gone (update 1)

Carolin passed away last night at the hospice while a neighbour was reading to her.

Reflecting on her recent experiences, I'm most impressed by her determination that her condition was not going to stop her from doing what she thought she should do. She shared Singapore and cruising with her daughter despite more conservative advice. She was front and center with her binoculars watching Jess snowboard on Sundays despite failing eyesight and a wheelchair. She refused to complain.

We are aiming for a Catholic Service on Thursday March 8 in the afternoon in Calgary.

Hospice (update1)

This afternoon Carolin moved to Agape Hospice at 1320 - 8th Ave NW in Calgary. (ph 282-6588) Visiting hours are "anytime" but if it is outside business hours you have to buzz at the front door. She is on the second floor (turn right off the elevator) in the "green forest room". There are lots of private places to make calls, read books, or just visit.

You should be aware that Carolin is generally uncommunicative and often not aware of her surroundings.

Update

Carolin has many friends who are helping with food, their time or good wishes. It is a tribute to the care they all take that Carolin has not caught any colds despite the high traffic. Everyone is careful.

We've got a special bed on the main floor that makes things a little easier. The wheel chair is necessary if going more than a few feet. Carolin is awake for 6 hours a day (+/-) and tired of taking pills. Nothing we can do about that.

Not news

The faithful readers of this blog may be curious of the latest developments. With one exception they are all bad. The details would sadden everyone and would tell you more about the disease than it does about Carolin, so I'll be light on specifics.

Carolin has lost a lot of mobility and must sleep a lot, but she still plans her day (and everyone elses) with a daytimer that she has much trouble reading. She is more willing to let others help now and we have many friends looking after her. It continues to amaze me how she won't quit. I know it is a cliche but she refuses to complain about her many serious aches and pains. She gets out of bed each day and starts returning phone calls and scheduling outings. She refuses to be overwhelmed by her problem.

Latest radiation

Carolin started a course of 5 radiation treatments on Tues (22nd) on her neck. This is to relieve the pain she gets in her neck and shoulder. It won't have an effect on her other cancer sites.

We're going to have lots of company in the next little while. My sister and her husband visited last weekend. My other sister is driving up from Salt Lake City with her daughter this weekend. Carolin's sister is wrestling with flight times from San Francisco and Carolin's Dad and Gail are looking for a time when there's not too many other guests. We're not much as hosts but people seem not to mind.

We were pointed at a clinical trial for Tykerb and Xeloda. Carolin might qualify however she has previously had a bad reaction to Xeloda, so they might say no. 15-20% of the people in the trial so far have had a positive reaction to the drug combination. It has bought them a few more weeks. It is not a cure. In Carolin's case she'd have to spend those weeks in the US. With an 80% chance that there's no improvement, we've decided to spend our time in Calgary.

Cancer cannot....

This was posted by a good friend. Carolin wanted it put on the top level.

What Cancer Cannot Do
Cancer is so limited....
It cannot cripple love
It cannot shatter hope
It cannot corrode faith
It cannot destroy peace
It cannot kill friendship
It cannot supress memories
It cannot silence courage
It cannot invade the sole
It cannot steal eternal life
It cannot conquer the spirit
......

On the weekend Carolin made it to watch Jessica's snowboarding lessons on Sunday. She's very intent on watching Jessica in her daily events. This proved to be a long day and she was in bed about 5 pm. This week she's doing Herceptin on Monday, and getting radiation on her neck on Tuesday. On Friday "home care" is making a second visit. They're providing whatever is needed to keep Carolin home instead of at the hospital.

Cramming a lot of stuff in 2 and a half years

It's only been 2.5 years since a lump turned Carolin's world around. Her case was one of the stubborn ones and over that time many friends, neighbours, doctors, and technicians have chipped in their love and expertise to make things better for Carolin and our family. Two and a half years in, the battle is not going our way.

Today the doctor reviewed the latest test results. The liver cancer is there but it is also not the primary concern. It has responded to the Xeloda chemotherapy in the past. The cancer in her neck is a problem but some radiation may be done to knock it back a little. Carolin wears a neck brace much of the time. However the primary concern is the cancer in her head.

The cancer in her head is causing many symptoms including very poor vision, bad balance, and slurred speech. In the past the tumour in the center of her brain has been treated by both general radiation and stereo-tactical radiation. Unfortunately that tumour continues to grow and more radiation in the brain is not possible. The doctors are out of treatment options.

Several people have asked about chemotherapy and the brain. Unfortunately that doesn't work. The chemo molecules are too big to cross the blood-brain barrier so they don't get into the brain. The Xeloda treatments may help the cancer sites in her body, it won't help her head. If someone knows of something new that is injectable and treats the brain, I'd like to hear about it. (Tykerb cannot be dispensed in Canada).

Sandy

2007

2007 looks like it will pick up where 2006 left off for Carolin. In the first week she'll be at the hospital for a spinal trace (a first for her) and an MRI of her head, in addition to the usual Herceptin intravenous. She is also working with her normal doctor ('normal' as in not cancer-related) on a problem with her finger tips that are painful. She's said before that January would be back to the full cancer treatments so she should've asked for a hospital parking pass for Christmas. 2007 will have more visits to the nice folks at the Foothills hospital.

From our house to yours, may all of you who have supported Carolin for so long, have a happy and healthy New Year.

Sandy

Disney's Tropical Christmas

I'm happy to report that our Christmas was merely confusing. Somehow Santa visited a small stateroom without waking anyone up. As for the hallways of our mighty vessel, I'll be quite happy not to hear Christmas caroles played on a steel drum for awhile. You really need snow for the proper effect although Disney tries hard with soap bubbles distributed liberally in common areas. Jessica's Christmas breakfast consisted of chocolate and Pez's - some things stay the same no matter the latitude.

Carolin's working hard to be independent. This can cause scenes later in the day when she runs out of energy but you can't fault her determination. As we all work through this we're learning when to offer help and when to get out of the way. Tomorrow we'll be home. I hope Calgary still has some snow.

Disney 3

There are some things you learn cruising. On this one I learned that any long series of ship horn blasts that doesn't sound like a Disney theme song, means we should get into our disney insignia life jackets and proceed to our nearest Goofy Getaway life raft. So far it's just been drills.

Made landfall at St. Maarten's. We passed on the canned tours and grabbed a taxi to a nice beach. We wanted to bypass the cruise companies and support the locals. I don't think the locals need our help any more. It cost $15 just to sit under an umbrella on a beach. But it was a nice beach and Jess had a great time racing waves and making friends. And big surprise - we avoided sunburn. Guess we had to save something for tomorrow.

Carolin did fine. A nap in the afternoon did wonders and she and I snuck away for a nice evening meal at the fancy cruise ship restaurant. Jess played at the kids club and didn't even miss us.

More later.

Disney 2

The cruise was to be the highlight of the trip and it looks like it will live up to the advance billing. None of us has been on a cruise before so it's all new and exciting.

Jess is having a very good time and is making a new best friend at a rate of about 1 per hour. She gets a kick out of getting her own food whenever she wants. Of course her choices are always healthy. Carolin's walking, not riding while on board. This limits how far we can go at any one stretch but there's often a rail or a wall handy if she feels too tippy. Lots of kids.

First stop was the exotic port of Key West. It poured rain all day so we weren't tempted to try the Key Lime Pie they advertised. Food isn't what we're short of.

Disney 1

Westjet got us to Orlando quite nicely and the luggage found its way to the hotel room by magic. Carolin is riding a wheelchair full time from the Calgary airport.

Disney World is very spread out. We ride buses to wherever we want to get to and so are now familiar with the challenges of wheelchairs and public transportation. A surprising number of disney rides accommodate people in chairs so we haven't been limited too much there. Carolin will transfer into seats in some rides. Jess wants to push most of the time.

Carolin's vision is poor and she has to work very hard to read menus. Things at a more than 20 ft are not visible for her. This combination with the commotion that only Walt Disney can put together, wear her out fast. It was a challenge to stay up late enough to catch one of the firework displays.

High points for the Magic Kingdom park and the bus drivers.
Low points for Epcot's rides with the exception of Soaring over California which was fantastic.
Two days with rain. Saturday off to the cruise.

vacation countdown

Carolin's difficulties getting around are continuing, The neck pain seems under control but the combination of double vision, bad balance and medication wears her out quickly, and a good nap in the middle of the day is necessary. Through all of this she keeps her conviction that she's going to get past this problem soon.

She'll see the radiation doctors for the neck and brain in the new year. On Tuesday we go on a trip so she and Jess can have some fun together. Several people have urged her to stay home but she won't cancel her chance to make memories with her daughter. It should be a special trip.

She has asked me to explain that she can't answer the emails of support she's getting. She values them and doesn't want people to think she's ignoring them. She wants me to wish Merry Christmas to everyone and that she'll be back blogging in the New Year.

Sandy

Staging results

Carolin had a battery of tests last week. This week we heard the source of the double vision and headaches.

The doctor says that the cancer is out of control right now. The brain tumour is larger but more MRI's are needed to determine if it's swelling (necrosis) or new growth. There is some (inconclusive) evidence that the cancer has spread to the outside of the brain. It is the source of the vision problem. Large doses of steroids are the treatment.

The neck pain is not entirely from the collapsing vertabrae. New cancer has appeared in the neck bones and is winding around the nerves. This may respond to radiation. A second opinion will be sought about treatment. Carolin sees the neck/cancer doctor tomorrow about stabilizing the neck. She has more pain killers in the mean time.

The liver spots are getting bigger however that is not a concern given the problems above.

Nobody is more upbeat about this than Carolin. It's amazing to me.

Sandy

Brain trouble update

Carolin's double vision has not improved. We're two days into the steroids that should shrink the brain tumour and it's about now we'd expect some improvement. She can't scrapbook, read or write. She believes that she's getting fat because of the steroids. Added all together she's not a happy camper. The MRI of her head is on Friday and the a doctors visit to hear the results on Monday. Will write again then.

Guess I'll be doing the blogging for a bit.

Sandy

Maybe my other senses will compensate

My vision isn't working right. Double vision. I can sort-of read with one eye. Driving is out. Buttering toast is hit or miss. More tests this week. Next week the doctor.
C

Thinking about my neck again

On Sunday we had a nice trip to the local ski hill to watch Jess try out her new snow board. She was pretty game about picking herself up 892 times. I don't have to pick myself up nearly that much, and I'm complaining???

The neck diagnosis was just settling in when I caught the flu. That's a real time saver as now I don't need a flu shot. I didn't think about my neck for 2 straight days. Uhhhgg. The flu is not fun. But now I'm back to normal and you know what? My neck still hurts. So the flu is NOT the cure for a bad neck and worse headache. Now we know.

Short view

My neck has been hurting enough that last week I asked the physiotherapist to OK an X-ray. The X-ray report came back saying that my C-5 vertabrae had collapsed. I knew that previously C-3 had collapsed and that C-6 had a void where cancer use to be, but C-5 was new. On went the *^!X^ neck collar.

Today I saw my regular bone doctor. He looked at the x-ray and pointed out that my C-3 has collapsed to the point where the radiologist missed it. He had miscounted my neck vertabrae and his comments were about C-6.

Good. No new bones involved but it looks like C-6 is getting shorter now too. Soon I'm going to need to sit on a phone book to see out the van's windshield. However it's the neck/shoulder pain that's the problem. The good doctor suggests I wait until C-6 stops collapsing, and the neck muscles compensate. Then the neck pain will go away.

I need to find a doctor with a magic wand.

Love
Carolin

Pic's

This gives you an idea of the view from our balconey. Nice and green (and warm). Sandy likes all the ships.

Cold

I'm freezing! Sandy won't let me turn up the thermostat to where I want it so I'm buried under all the blankets in the house.

The trip home was long but we got to visit my sister in San Fran on the stop over there. The airline threatened to divert to Great Falls Montana because of bad weather at Calgary. It didn't happen but that would've been something - Singapore in the morning, Great Falls in the evening. We made it home about midnight local time.

Today we woke up to a clean house (thanks Michelle), snow and back to the real world. I have a pain in my neck that's making things harder but the sore throat I had yesterday is getting better. A few more hours of sleep and I'll be straightened out again.

Tomorrow I'll be convincing Sandy that I should be driving again.

Singapore 3

Tonight we're packing to head home. It went by quickly. We rode a luge (a fancy go cart), saw a marvelous night safari (lots of big animals up close), experienced a real rain storm (not a woosy north american gully washer), got more pool time, and loaded up a camera with enough pictures for more than a few scrapbooking weekends. We met good people from the UK, Hong Kong, Australia, California and two characters from Pakistan. The trip home promises to be long but it's always great to sleep in your own bed.

So tomorrow at 6AM local time we'll climb into a cab and start the trek. 24 hrs later we should be wondering why there isn't a snow brush in the car at the Park-n-Jet place. We're looking forward to it.

Singapore 2

I guess our difficulties with the heat and humidity aren't getting much sympathy in Calgary with the snow showing up. Trick or Treaters are going to all look like Eskimos.

Today we started the day off at 6AM (Jess's jetlag is getting one hour better every day) with a tour of the grounds. We were rewarded by spotting two monitor lizards. There's a creature that looks best from a distance. The lizards ran off and hid so I didn't have to show my bravery (or lack thereof) in front of the 8 yr old. During the day we went to a very large aviary after the cab driver talked us out of going to the zoo during the heat of the day. The adjacent reptile world was closed except for a small size tank that featured prawn fishing. We passed on that. Then home for the pool. A passing thunderstorm cleared the pool a couple of hours later but also cooled things off. In the evening we went to the island's musical fountain. A lot of effort went into the show and a very large crowd seemed to like it. A bit tame for us. Blame TV.

Carolin's doing well. Yesterday she had too much sun but today seems fine. The balance is still a problem but she makes it through the day as well as any of us. We'll be home for the weekend.

Singapore 1

On the 25th we climbed on board Air Canada and zipped down to LA to connect onto Singapore. It didn't seem like a 'zip' until thought of in retrospect following some of the other flights we have made. In LA we overnighted at an airport hotel and were able to catch up with Dad and Mona at brunch. They dropped us at LAX departures at noon. At check in we were advised of the delay that would not see our plane off the ground until 5:30 PM. We were able to lounge in the fancy business class area because of Carolin's first class ticket so killing time was a matter of pacing yourself with the free pop and chips.

Once on board the flight (10 hrs 50 minutes) we settled in with two meals, 50 channels of seat-back TV and a spare seat between Jess and I. Carolin had to suffer in first class where the new seats can be made into flat beds with down comforters. In peasant class, Jess and I were happy when the people didn't put their seats back so far we had to lie down to see the TVs. All of us made it to our stopover in Tokyo at the same time.

There we were kicked off the plane so it could be cleaned and reloaded. No spare seat this time and Jess amused herself with video games loaded on the plane's TV. I worked on the crick in my neck and was quite successful. 6 hrs from Tokyo to Singpore. We arrived about 4 AM local time and took a taxi to our hotel. Bed looked good.

The next day (Saturday due to the international date line) we got caught up on all the new developments on the island and Jess found a new good friend from Australia. They were just getting back home after touring Italy and the Med. In the afternoon we got to see Singapore's Halloween up close. The kids were given plastic bags and toilet paper to make costumes (tough job), then they were judged by the collection of folks around the pool. Then they "shot the ghost". This meant firing water balloons at some poor guy in a canoe in the pool. There was a lot of noise but not a lot of burst balloons. Kids turn out to be pretty bad shots.

We were also caught in the rain on the top of a double decker bus, visited an aquarium where we held a big snake (not sure of the connection there), travelled up to Mount Faber on a gondola that goes through a building, and saw a lot of weddings at the resort. The only real wildlife was two monkeys climbing the balconies and many oddly coloured birds including the 'Canada Goose Chicken", or at least that's what Jess named it when we found it making a lot of noise in a tree.

Weather is hot and muggy with a lot of haze from either forest fires in Indonesia or heat-haze. The airconditioner is getting a workout although Carolin's claiming frost bite. Jet lag went fine with Jess having trouble sleeping at 4 AM twice but that's all. More later.

Sandy

2 weeks have gone by...

...but nothing really new that is worth writing about. I am able to spend the day by myself now. I can make it up and down the stairs a few times a day. However, I am certainly tired by 8 pm though. I still have to be careful that I don't get too far down that I can't get up (eg. sitting on the floor). Sitting in a chair is about as far as I go when I am alone otherwise I am afraid that I will get stuck.

We had a nice Thanksgiving. My dad and Sandy's daughter both came from Edmonton. Ate lots, played some games and had a nice weekend. I even found some time for a nap.

Yesterday I asked the doctor if I could stop taking the steriods and he said yes. So today is my first steriod free day. I hope all this weight comes off quickly. 2 weeks as of today we leave for Singapore. It would be so great to be looking better and feeling better.

So I still weeble and wooble but I am certainly stronger than before.

Jessica is home from school, so time to say goodbye.

Love to you all.

Carolin

Slow but steady recovery

Hi there everyone!!

Well things are slow but going the right direction. The mornings are the best for me when I have the most leg strength (after a coffee that is). I can make it down the stairs from the second floor to the main but not ready to take on the basement stairs yet (concrete landing, no carpet and steeper). Getting up the stairs is better than before but certainly still more difficult. By bed time I use a lot of Sandy's strength to make it up them.

My puffiness from the steroids is still sticking around. Have gain 7 pounds since my big weight loss in the hospital. But sitting around and not getting out doing much walking (Rylie is complaining too) makes the weight gain easy. My hair is still showing up on the vanity which is a real concern to me. I will ask the Dr. when I see him next.

Nothing else on the home front.

Thanks for still reading this blog.

Love Carolin

PS Take the time to go for a nice walk in the fall colored trees for me. Maybe we will try to take my walker or wheelchair to Bowness on the weekend. I think the whole family would enjoy that - and the fact that Sandy always buys Jess and I ice cream. See what I mean about the weight gain - sit in a wheelchair and then have ice cream!!!

Long day at the hospital

Well yesterday I spent from 1:00 pm till 6:00 pm at the Tom Baker. What a long day of waiting. The nurses were run off their feet and there were no beds or chairs to treat people. I think Monday's are usually busy days anyways. But 5 hours was a bit long.

I had a chest and abdomen x-ray done just to make sure all the air in my bowels was gone. There is no free air. Good.

I get to drop my steriods to once every second day. Hurray!!

My doctor agreed that I will not do any more treatment (other than my regular pills) until January. This will allow us to take our trips with no chance of an adverse reaction to drugs. He will scan me in November just to make sure things stay under control.

In January I would like to try new drug called Tykerb. I don't believe it is released in the States yet but it has really good reports. Dr. Webster is going to work on seeing if I can get it in January. I hope so. Herceptin may be working some (liver spots are smaller) but it doesn't seem to be keeping the cancer away totally.

So all good news.

Walking is getting better, legs are getting stronger, and I have gained 5 pounds. Sandy's mom Lorna still comes to stay with me everyday in case I fall, drives me to appointments and keeps me company. I also cannot do stairs by myself which means it is hard to take care of Rylie when no one is here to let her out. So she spends lots of time next door with her "Grandparents". I have received a handicapped parking pass which makes things much easier when I do some walking (errands) and working with the wheel chair when the walk is too long.

Well that is the update.

Nothing on the doctor side of things for the next 3 weeks until I have Herceptin and see the Dr.

Love to you all

Carolin

Nasty little surprise

Well my hands have totally peeled. It did not hurt but I spent about a week peeling off all the dead skin. They look just disgusting. Sandy will post a picture when he gets a chance. Come back and look in a few days.

My nasty little surprise is that I am losing my hair. Maybe not a lot (only about 15-20 hairs on the vanity) but I usually don't see ANY hairs when I dry my hair. So what the heck in happening. I have blood work, Herceptin and see my doctor on Monday and find out about the bone scan. So I will ask because this didn't happen with the first 2 rounds of chemo.

Now some very exciting news - Sandy, Jessica and I are going to Singapore. Sandy and I went to Singapore about 4 or 5 years ago and both came to the conclusion that it is the most beautiful place we have ever been. So now we want to share that with Jessica. We are going Oct 25 - Nov 3. We are very excited and will stay on Sentosa Island where we stayed last time. Hopefully this will make up some of our disappointments when we had to cancel our trip to China, our cruise to Panama, and our shortened trip to Parksville. Jessica was a good trooper and never made a fuss about having to cancel everything. We are however missing the James Blunt concert (many tears from Jessica) that we had tickets to, but hey wait until she sees Singapore.

We have a quiet weekend this weekend but with the rain what the heck are you going to do outside anyway. I use a 2 wheeled walker at home, have a wheelchair for any big excursions, a handicap parking pass and bath seat for the shower. So things are OK at home. And thank goodness for Lorna coming everyday to stay with me. If ever I fall (usually at least once a day) I am like a turtle on my back and I can't get up. So I have Lorna or my friends staying with me all the time. I am very lucky to have such great friends.

Well time to sign off.

With all my love,

Carolin

I will write on Monday night about the doctors appointment.

Slow and steady

Now that the weather has cooled off a little, it's not as bad to be spending so much time indoors. Since getting out of the hospital and dropping a lot of the meds I was on, I've steadily got stronger. Still there's a way to go. Lorna (Sandy's mom) spends most days with me and has been good enough to run me between chores and appointments. Karen, Collette and Michelle have all been generous with their time. They're all darlings to help so I can get pretty much all the things done that I want.

I'm hoping that I'll be able to return all the aids-to-daily-living stuff we have around the house sometime in October. I'm getting better at walking but the walker is great to have when I get tired. Falls are still a problem. It's a lousy feeling to know you're going over but not be able to stop yourself.

But the trend is positive. I'm getting a little stronger each day. (And Sandy is doing the vacuuming)

Carolin

Good news

Well I can drop some of my meds and a few meds I only have a few last dosages to take. That is good news for me. Then I can start cleansing by body. I get to drop my steroids by half on Monday. Down to 2 mg once a day.

The MRI of my brain confirms that the tumor was enlarged because of radiation necrosis. It has decreased in from 2.1 cm x 2.6 cm to 1.8 cm x 1.8 cm. My doctor and I are very happy with the news.

So my main job right now is to build up my muscles. The steroids is what is causing my muscle deteriation, leg and upper body weakness. More walking and building up some muscle. When my mouth feels better maybe protein will be more of an option. Right now everything is still too dry - bread, meat, etc. Fruit is good and soup but I need to watch that I don't take in too many non-starching things that may cause bad bowels again.

So we are on the mend. I had a bone scan today and will get the results on Monday.

Time to go.

Love to everyone.

Carolin

Home from Pincher

I am home from Pincher Creek. I had the most wonderful weekend. I got a lot of pages finished and was really happy with each one. My friends all pitched in to help me move from building to building, from table to computer, made sure I took my pills and did my exercises. You could say I had my own complete set of angels. I had a nap everyday and even had a massage.

Not too busy of a week. Jessica starts school tomorrow. I have an MRI and will see me neck/bone doctor. No problem or pain with my neck anymore but I do go for physio every 3 weeks to keep things in check.

Well time to read with Jessica.

Good night and love to you all.

Carolin

Home from the hospital

I arrived home from the hosiptal yesterday about 4:00 pm. Soooo very nice to be home and in my own bed. I am feeling much better. The worst part is I have very little leg strength and control. I need to hang on to furniture and walls so I don't fall. It is hard to get from sitting to standing without Sandy almost picking me up. My knees just seem to buckle. Hopefully the strength will coming back quickly.

I came home to an astonishing 76 Emails of support and annonymous blog entries. Thank you so much for your love and continued support. Also thank you for the flowers and the many meals for the eatting and freezing.

I am off scrapboking for the weekend at Pincher Creek. Not to worry there are no stairs and I have my 8 best friends to take care of me and hover and mother me whether I like it or not. I also have a cane and a walker. So I will be well taken care of.

My love to you all.

Carolin

Update August 29

The doctor does not think that Carolin will be in the hospital over the Christmas holidays. It just seems that way.

- they haven't been agressive against the diarrehea because they were worried about the hole in her bowel. That treatment would have made things there worse. So far Carolin still doesn't show any symptoms that would make them want to operate.
- the weakness is now thought to be from the steroids, not the xeloda as originially reported. I had thought it was because she's only now starting to eat after 10 days. They've cut the steroid dose in half again.
- they're going to give her insides a rest from xeloda (her last type of chemo). Instead they are going to try an older, better tolerated chemo to keep things in check until her insides heal up. In a few months they will go back to a reduced dose of xeloda because it does seem to work for her liver.
- her hands are going to peel. (they don't look too good as it is). Feet are OK.
- she's taking 5 pills to replace all the potassium she's lost. More pills.

She's quite weak and needs help walking and getting up from chairs. The runs to the bathroom are getting less rushed but are still more regular than she would like. Today she's unhooked from all the intravenouses to prove she can go without them. We're hoping to get her out of the hospital tomorrow.

Sandy

Still in hospital

Carolin's wrapping up a full week in the hospital. She's rehydrated and thinking well but still suffering from diarrehea. 10 days of it!! Modern medicine is working on it. Hopefully she can come home at the start of this week.

Update #2

Carolin's still in the hospital and it looks like it might be Monday before she gets out. Her spirits are good and she looks great (except for the knees), but the diarrehea continues. They're using some high power drugs to slow things down but they didn't have any effect until today. Things MIGHT be slowing down.

Yesterday she had a CT scan of her liver. The cancer there has shrunk substantially (Yeah!!) but it also showed she had air in her stomach. The only way to get that is from a perferated bowel. Because she doesn't have any symptoms of pertonitis, they are just going to wait and see if it has fixed itself. Meanwhile she has surgeon residents dropping by to check on her stomach pain (or lack of it) quite often.

Sorry about the delay in the updates but the internet connection died here at home.

Sandy

Update 1 / Monday

Carolin's own oncologist saw her this morning. Her weakness, sore hands and feet, and diarrehea can all be side-effects of her xeloda (chemo) drug. She'll be in the hospital until they can stop all the bathroom trips. They figure that will be 3 days. She's in a good frame of mind but still can't walk without help. As soon as she starts eating again maybe we'll get her strength up and the walking will come back too.

Vacation's Done

On Friday Carolin was no better. Saturday was a little worse. She had persistent stomach cramps and diarrehea, couldn't walk and didn't have the strength to stand up. Saturday morning we decided to drive home. By Vancouver it was apparent this wasn't going to work. We grabbed a Westjet flight from Vancouver to Calgary and had an ambulance meet the plane.

Working through Emergency in Calgary isn't quick but it is familiar. 18 hours after we started she was admitted into the Foothills hospital. The diarrehea is continuing but she is much more coherent probably due to the saline IV. The feeling is that she has to get back on her medications (except the chemo). She's been avoiding them because anything in her stomach might make her problem worse. The balance is still off but that's the original brain tumour. Her strength is poor. Some tests aren't back.

I'll update later.

Sandy

Over relaxed on vacation

Parksville is just what we had hoped. Lots of beach, strange critters, kids and sun burn. Unfortunately I'm getting to the end of this cycle of chemo and things are not good. I'm too weak to get up stairs or even out of a chair without help. I'm always cold and have to stay near the bathroom. I called the doctor and filled him in.

I can stop taking this chemo. Now I just have to build up a little strength so I can make a trip down the beach with Jess. No problem. We've got lots of time left here and by all reports, there's no end of little criters to find.

Love
Carolin

On vacation #1

We made it to Vancouver Island and are settled into our spot on the beach. The weather is perfect and the pace is nice and slow. Of course day 1 heading for the beach I took a header right in front of Jessica. The knee took another hit and now looks quite gruesome. Once down on the beach Jess had a great time hunting crabs about a quarter of the size of a dime, and clams. The tidal flats here are large and filled with excited kids. This is what summer is suppose to be like.

Today I went to a spa nearby. I could live in there. Wow. I was so relaxed when I came out of there I just floated out the front door.
More later.

Carolin

One step back

I saw the doctor today while I was getting my herceptin. I told him the short version of my recent problems. He thought that most of the side effects were from the high dose of steroids. As my balance is worse than ever, the steroids aren't working so he cut my dose in half.

The pill chemo were going to keep doing. Their side effects aren't bad enough to stop.

The steroids are to fix my brain problems. Without that option it's a short list of choices. After the next MRI in September I'll get to hear what the choices are. For now I'm tired, clumsy and going to bed.

Side effects

This week my sister from San Fran and I and the kids went to see my dad in Edmonton. Too bad it turns out this is the week all the side effects they warn about, show up. The worst is mouth sores that makes it hard to talk, let alone eat. Soup is as good as I can do right now. But that's not a problem as my stomach is not happy either. "Rot gut" the doctor called it. Seems appropriate. Of course there's a pill for that.

All in all I'm sleeping a bunch waiting for these things to pass. Did a muga scan yesterday and will see the doctor again next Tuesday. He'll be deciding if I can stay on this chemo or not.

Love
Carolin

Halfway through summer ????

How'd that happen so fast? We might be half way through summer vacation but I still can't bear to look at the school supplies filling up the stores. Maybe in a couple more weeks.

Today is the last day for my current round of chemo. This round meant two pills twice a day so it's not like the needle pokes from the other chemo treatements. This one is doing something though. I get nose bleeds and my throat got raw. But I made it through. Now a week off of chemo to heal up and then we start some more.

The balance is either getting better or I'm getting use to stumbling. The chemo means I don't heal too quick so all the bruises on my legs are just hanging around - not getting any better. It looks like I went 10 rounds with a clumsy clog dancer. As for the steroids, yikes! Let's talk about something else.

Love
Carolin

Little miss chubby cheeks is here

Well the steroids have had their desired effect on the water retention. Still only 50% on correcting the balance issues. This is also week 2 of chemo. No symptoms of hand and foot redness, tingling, burning or peeling. I am being really pro-active with special attention to creams on my feet and hands to keep them in good shape. An ounce of prevention.... If the symptoms show up we are supposed to go to the Horse Store and buy something called Bag Balm. Now doesn't that have an appealing name.

My nails are another issue. They are just peeling and breaking. I am going to find a good OPI polish that might give them some strength and durability. My toe nails are still splitting lengthwise which is a problem in some of my shoes. But considering these are small hurdles to deal with.

This is a nice quiet week. Jessica has swim lessons and then we have our afternoons free. My sister and her 2 children come on Saturday for about 10 days and we will celebrate Sandy's birthday on the 30th.

So for now I am just enjoying the summer weather.

Bye for now.

Love Carolin

Pill's, pills and more pills

Things are going fine. The steroids are working a bit but certainly have not gotten rid of all the balance problems. My arms and legs are getting quite bruised. I tend to lean to the right when walking. I tend to lean right into door frames, furniture and other things that get in my way when I need a little more space.

I have started my pill regime last week and I'm back on chemo as of yesterday. Everyday I now take 18 pills except Monday and Thursday. Those two days I take 20. Most of them need to be taken with water and food but each dose is separate. A lot of keep track of. All these little meals with the pills will certainly help put on the pounds. Urgghh!

The weight has started to gain. Up 5 pounds so far. Not too happy about that but I know it will come back off again.

Jessica is in camp this week so I have some extra time to myself. I put in about 8 hours a night sleeping but tend to be up 4 or 5 times in that period. Could be all that water that I have to drink! I still like to have a lay down in the afternoon so that I have some energy to keep me up till 9 pm.

That is all that is new.

Enjoy the sun!!

Love Carolin

Pre-steroids

I had my hair done for the second time since it has grown back in. Have not had it cut yet. Seems to be growing in evenly and thick. It was finally long enough to put in some chunky blonde highlights.

I have been on steroids for 2 days now. I weigh in every morning and watch and wait for the evilness of the steroid "fatness" to arrive. You will not see any pictures of me posted while going through this stage.

Love to you all.

Carolin

On balance, it's good news

Although it took the better part of the day, now we have a diagnosis. My head was so interesting that they did two separate MRI's of it today. When my oncologist told us about what they saw, he said that they felt it was the radiation necrosis. It is the swelling of the tumor mass that the body has not yet disposed of. The swelling is pushing on the brain and affecting my balance. It is quite bad now and I am banging into more things and pretty much walking like a drunk. I don't feel intoxicated anymore but it would be hard to tell that when walking behind me. My oncologist passed the treatment over to the Dr. that did the stereo-tactical radiation surgery. She likes steroids. LOTS and LOTS of steroids. And she likes them for a long time. I start tonight and looks like we are on them for the next 2 months.

This will hopefully work and eliminate my symptoms but as long-time readers of this blog will know, steroids makes me fat. Yes, fat over the 2 months of summer that we get. That sucks!! But like Sandy says at least I'm not in a wheel chair. Plus this time I have hair to go with my fat face - better than being bald. But for right now, its steroids until my balance comes back, then it's negotiation with the doctor to see how fast we taper off them. In about a week, I can restart my pill chemo.

It looks like we're back on the treatment track.

I will finish pouting tonight and then start fighting again tomorrow.

Bye for now.

Love Carolin

Called the MRI people

The trip was a nice change of pace. The weather cooperated and Jessica is already getting a tan and threatening to wear out a bathing suit. Summer is a great time when you're 8.

It seems like my balance is getting worse. I'm starting to get bruises from the things I'm bumping into. My brain is thinking fine, it's just not helping me walk. Today I called the doctor and said that the current MRI booking on July 26 wasn't soon enough. We'll see what he can do.

Update: Have an MRI at noon on Monday (10th) and a doctor meeting at 2PM. More news Monday night.

Still waiting

Well I have to say this is the longest I have waited for an appointment since this whole process started 2 years ago. I have still not heard of my MRI date. I have made several phone calls but no call back with a date. We are off to Panorama tomorrow afternoon until Thurday afternoon. So it for sure won't be until the week after we return.

Still wobbly but no headaches or dizziness. Maybe everything will heal itself by the time I get an MRI date.

Happy Canada Day to everyone!!

Love Carolin

PS I won't be blogging until I get back.

Waiting

Still waiting for an MRI appointment. My head is a bit clearer than it was on the weekend but I am still really fatigued and my balance is still affected which causes me to stumble quite a bit and weave back and forth. The mornings are better than the afternoons.

Hopefully we will have an answer soon.

Carolin

Enjoy the sun!!

Dr. says...

Friday I went to see my oncologist. He was concerned that I was having a lot of the symptoms that I had with my previous brain tumours. He did a lot of things to check my nerves, coordination, and strength. I thought I did fine. Sandy says my right leg flunked a bunch of tests (reflex and sharp/dull). But what does he know, The doctor scheduled me for (another) MRI on Monday or Tuesday. He listed the things it could be. Funny how his lists have more bad things than good things on them.

I'll won't really worry until I have to ask directions to the MRI machine. Then I'll know something's not right upstairs.

Legs quit

This morning while chewing my morning multivitamin, I fell on the floor. Sandy said there was a little piroette involved but basically I fell down without warning. I got back to bed but I couldn't walk. At noon I tried again. It wasn't pretty. Hot flashes. Cold flashes. Light headed and generally a hazard to small things that crush easily. I called and cancelled my herceptin (not something I do lightly).

Then I got a surprise. The cancer clinic called back and said that the herceptin was premixed, cost $3,000 a dose (!!) and I had better go get it. Friends rallied around and got me there and back. Now at supper time, I'm just a little dozy but I can walk. I going to cut back on the Tylenol 3s.

What did it? Don't know. Hopefully low blood pressure.

Busy news day

As I was driving out of town on Friday, I found out that today was the time for moving my port. This involved removing it from the left side of my chest and inserting it on the right. This is day surgery but when I got there I found out that an overnight bed had been reserved for me 'just in case'. Is there nothing in my life that doesn't have drama??

The operation went OK but I ended up very sore on the right side with big time bruising already. I have herceptin scheduled for tomorrow but I'm not letting them near that port until it stops hurting. Thinking about that makes my eyes water.

I stayed at the hospital until my afternoon appointment with the oncologist rolled around. He had a lot of news:

- I need an enhanced MRI to see what is going on in my head. There's three choices, the tumour's bigger (bad news), there is a chemo reaction called necrosis which can occur when the chemo inflames the previous site of an operation (bad news as it can require treatment), or nothing new (good news). No date for it yet.
- My last round of chemo didn't work. The liver cancer continues to grow with a new spot evident. So the chemo continues. The new chemo is a pill I take twice a day for two weeks, then one week off, then more pills. Great news - my hair won't fall out and it won't make me fat. I told the doctor that was my best birthday present. I start it tomorrow. Well of course there's a dark side to the pill chemo. You can get a reaction where the skin on your hands and feet peel off. I think I'll notice that.
- The bone scan is 'really tricky' to read. The report wondered if there was something going on in one vertebrae. This spot has been seen before and thought to be a dead tumour that left a space. Anyway the treatment for it would be the same as I'm going to be taking anyway.

I'm very tired. Why does the final hockey game have to be tonight?

Love
Carolin

Neck MRI, Muga scan, Dye study results

When I saw my oncologist on May 29th he told me his version of the MRI on my neck. He said that the report said that there was slightly less height in the C3 but no narrowing of the spinal canal. That is good news. There is still shadowing in the C6 so they will keep a watch on that.

My muga results were fine. 68% this time and last time it was 70%. I don't know what the acceptable range is.

Yesterday I had a dye study done on my port. They put me under a special machine that they do angiograms with. They then injected dye into the port and watched as the fluid traveled through the catheter. And guess what. It didn't!! It flows close to the end and then backs up into the small vessels in my front shoulder/chest area. This is a no-no. It means that the chemo is entering little tiny veins in a concentrated form. The chemo would have still circulated through my body but that is probably what made me so sick last time. So they cannot use my port anymore. I will see the port surgeon next Thursday. I believe that the choices are to fix the catheter in this port (it use to go straight down but is now has a 45 degree curve in it) or to remove and replace the whole thing. It is only day surgery but they still need an operating room. I don't know how long this will take. I guess my next Herceptin treatment will be done using an IV in my hand. Yuck!!

Sandy and I had a great a little vacation to Victoria and celebrated our 9th anniversary. It was nice to get away and not be a patient for a couple if days.

Nothing else new. Next week is a bone scan on the 12th, a chest and abdomen CT on the 14th and the port doctor on the 15th. I will not get the results of the scan and CT until I see my oncologist the following Monday. I will post the results as I get them.

Bye for now.

Love Carolin

Poor Chemo Experience

Most chemo treatments are not fun but I've gotten use to the routine. Today was a different experience. Today I was scared.

My one o'clock appointment meant I got in at 2. They are so busy, that's pretty normal. They hooked me up to my usual chemo bag and left it to drain in. When it finished, they started to flush the line and my port with saline. It was then that I got very ill. I passed out briefly (they say) and then threw up violently. After emptying my stomach they decided to move me to a bed while they sorted out what was going on. The movement brought more puke. I was sweating and cold. My vision was doubled. Sandy was called from work. When he got there I wasn't moving, could only give one word answers sometimes, and looked very bad. The doctor was working on the problem.

He said there were two possible causes, both remote. One was that I had had a reaction to the chemo. This was odd because its the same stuff I've had for more than 6 months. The second was that the chemo had triggered something in my head. A CAT scan was done to check the second possiblility. If it was the first one, I would improve on my own.

By the time the CAT scan was done, I was feeling much better. The CAT scan didn't show anything obviously wrong and they said I could go home. Sandy drove and I dozed. They had pumped me full of anti-nausea drugs and steroids (boo) to settle things down, and I was beat. At home it is straight to bed and we'll see what tomorrow brings. Regardless the doctors says its 2 weeks off chemo. That suits me just fine.

night, night
Carolin

Long time since I've written

Life has been busy and nothing really new on the health side of things but I have lots of requests that "something" is better than "nothing". So here it goes.

Since I wrote last I have finished one more complete cycle (3 sessions) of chemo and have just started another. No change in that status. Same side effects as before - tired for a few days afterwards and throwing up for no apparent reason at no specific time (just kind of catchs me off guard). I will finish this cycle and then have a scan from shoulders to hips looking for "anything" they might find interesting. Hopefully this one will be clean.

May 11 I had an MRI of my neck. It is at a point where they don't expect anymore changes. I still have some limitations to how far I can turn my head. Still in pain and seeing physio twice a week. I asked about putting a plate in but he said that I would lose more mobility and the surgery is far from straight forward. To reach the C3 they would have to go through the side of my neck. This could result in lose of feeling in the lower part of my face. My running career is finished. He said that the pain afterwards from the jarring would far outweight the benefits of running and suggested walking. Walking just doesn't do it for me though. As far as skiing, well we'll see in the winter. They will continue to MRI me every 3 months.

On Friday I had a muga scan to check my heart. Certain chemo's can have an effect on the hearts ability to pump. I should have the results on Monday.

On the calendar for June is a bone scan and a MRI of my head. Pretty quiet month so far.

On the non-medical side of life has been having new carpet installed in the entire house (major disruption for at least a week), Jessica's 8th birthday, scrapbooking retreat on the May long weekend, Jessica's soccer twice a week and the usual demands of life. Next weekend Sandy and I are taking a little trip to Victoria for 4 days. I am looking forward to that.

So that pretty much sums up the last 5 weeks.

I will try to be better at writing more often.

Love Carolin

The results of the Brain radiation

I visited the cancer clinic this morning to hear the results of the MRI on my head. Good news! The brain tumour had shrunk from 2 cm to 1.5 cm. That might not seem like much but it shows the treatment worked and the cancer is at least knocked back, and at best its dead. There's no way to know which it is.

I'll be getting an MRI on my noggin every 3 months from now on to see what it does next. I'm going to ask Sandy if we can get an MRI for the garage. It would save me a lot of time and we could plug it in at the neighbours when they weren't looking.

So I guess that's as good as we could have expected. Now if summer will hurry up, I can get some planting done.

Carolin

Home from SF

We arrived home yesterday afternoon. We did bring home strep throat. Another round of antibioatics. My throat is better this morning after being in a lot of discomfort the last 3 days.

We had a nice trip - a little sun, a little rain, lots of good food and some shopping of course.

Now back to the basics of driving Jessica to gymnastics, diving and soccer. And then driving myself to appointments.

Not much else to report.

Love to all.

Hope you had a nice Easter.

Carolin

Chemo #3 - Round 4

The nurse called me last night to tell me that my white count was not high enough but the Dr. was going to let me go ahead with chemo. I get a week off now. The chemo almost had to administered by an IV in my hand. They couldn't get blood return from my port (they normally can't) but the IV would run by gravity either. They have to be very cautious when administering chemo, that it is going into the vein as it can cause serious tissue damage if not. They finally had me lay in a bed and that got the IV flowing. Whew!! That was a close one. After that the chemo went fine.

I saw my neck doctor yesterday. Alignment is still good. He had a hard time seeing the bone in the area so he is sending me for an MRI. I should hear next week about a date. I need to go back through my blogs and count how many MRI's and CAT scans that I have had. More than a normal person I should think.

Jessica and I are off to San Francisco tonight to visit my sister and her family for a week. I have taken some anti nausea medication already to head things off early. Hopefully I will feel good tomorrow.

If anything note worthy happends I will blog from her house. If not then I will blog again next Wednesday.

Happy Easter to everyone.

Love Carolin

Chemo #2 - Round 4

Monday was lab day and Dr. day. My white counts were good so the chemo was a go for Tuesday. I didn't actually see the doctor because I didn't have any concerns.

Tuesday chemo went fine. They were about 1 hour behind schedule but I made it in time to get Jessica from the bus.

Tuesday night was bad. I guess I forgot about the side effects of chemo. Spent most of the night awake with nausea. Didn't actually get sick but had my head in a garbage can enough times that I wish I would have. Wednesday I was exhausted. Sandy drove me to my MRI appointment at 7 am and then brought me home. I slept until 11 am and then tried to watch some TV. Promptly fell asleep on the couch. Went back to bed and slept until Jessica came home at 3:30. I layed on the couch dozing until Sandy came home at 5:30. Good thing Jessica was happy to just watch TV. Was back in bed at 8 pm and slept until 7 am this morning.

Thursday morning now and after almost 24 hours of sleep I am feeling better. Tummy is still a bit queasy (sp?) but I can at least keep my eyes open.

A bit rainy and dreary today but that is fine as I still don't feel like doing too much.

I will get my MRI results on April 27 when I see my brain surgeon. This is to see how much of the tumor is gone. As I have so side effects I am expecting good results. But I have been fooled before.

Bye for now.

Love Carolin

Surgery postponed - AGAIN

The plastic surgeon will not do the reconstruction while I am on chemo. That's a really letdown. But he says if my white count is too low and I get an infection that the transplant could be lost. I can understand that but it doesn't make it any easier. Looks like we are looking towards fall now. Even though 8 weeks of chemo and 6 weeks recovery put us near the beginning of July the doc says they do very little elective surgery in the summer. Too many trauma's in the summer and too few doctors.

Chemo #1 - Round 4

Wow time goes by fast. And here we are again counting the chemo's. This will be the fourth round of chemo that I have had. It went OK yesterday. About 3 hours from start to finish. Boy am I glad that I have this port. I may not get it taken out. They put me in a bed yesterday instead of a chair. That is always nice. I had a little nap which seems to make the time go by faster. By now I think I have ownership in the hospital parking lot. I should have my own space.

I feel a bit strange about writing about chemo yet one more time. I can't imagine that you guys want to hear these details AGAIN. Most of you could probably give me my chemo by now. I will have to send out mini medical degreees to you all when this is complete. Anyway, I would like to know if you readers really want to read about this topic anymore.

I go see the plastic surgeon tomorrow. I hope this little set back won't interfere with my reconstruction. I REALLY want to get that done. I'll let you know what he says.

Also my oncologist has taken me off Aromasin. This is the drug that I had my oopheractomy to take. He figures with the reoccurances that I have had that it isn't working. Too bad I can't have my ovaries back.

Anyway off to my HAIR APPOINTMENT. I don't know why I am so excited as I only have about an inch of hair. But maybe a little highlighting will give it a bit of punch - right now it kind of looks like a helmet.

Gotta run.

Happy spring to everyone.

Love Carolin

The good, the bad and the ugly

The good is that spring is almost here. My tulips are starting to pop out of the ground. I have a spring in my step and Jessica has her bike out.

The bad is that my neck is in a lot of pain. I started physio this morning. He says "no neck collar". This makes the muscles weaker. I had acupuncture, heat and some muscle stimulation. Many many exercises to do many many times a day. I have to say that this afternoon it is feeling better already. But I have put my gym membership on hold for a while. If I can't be doing weights I may as well walk outside with the dog rather than walk inside on the treadmill.

The ugly part is that I start chemo again tomorrow. I have a new spot on my liver which is 2.2 cm x 1.8 cm. Back on Navelbine. Same as before - 3 weeks on and 1 week off. After 2 complete cycles (7 weeks) they will do another CAT scan. I will continue with Herceptin as well. My veins are getting hard in my right arm from so many needle pokes - the nurse says they are like rope. I need to have a blood draw before each chemo. Could be a challenge in the near future.

Well that's all I know for now.

Enjoy your day.

Love Carolin

No news is good news

Things have been going along. I've been getting stronger and now the afternoon naps are more a guilty pleasure rather than a necessity before supper. The herceptin treatments every third friday are a habit to be scheduled in rather than something that is the focus of the week. And my hair is growing like crazy. April 7 is my first hair appointment in like, FOREVER, and it looks like she'll have hair to work with. Yippee.

My neck is getting better sloooowwwly. I still get tired and wear my neck brace for part of the day. I've decided to do some physio to speed things up.

Last trip to the hospital was for a complete neck to hips CAT scan. On the chart I saw that I was a breast cancer patient who had metastasized to her head, bone, liver, and lungs. Lungs???? That's something I'll have to ask about next time I see the good doctor. If this keeps up it'll be faster to say where the cancer HASN'T been.

More later. (words, not cancer)

Muga scan

Muga scan went fine. Checked in at 8 am and was out of there by 10 am. They take blood and then mix it with radioactive dye, reinject it and then take the scans. Other than the needles it is painless. The technicians aren't able to give me the results but I expect everything to be fine. I will continue to have this done every 3 months while on Herceptin. Herceptin can have an effect on the heart muscle. The scan is just a precaution.

No appointments now until next week. Hurray!!

Herceptin next Friday March 10 at 9:30 am.

Have a great week.

Carolin

Bone scan results

The bone scan is clear. No problem with the hip area. The dark spots on my neck are probably new bone. The bone is the hardest spot to tell what is going on. There is still a cavity there even after the tumor is gone. New bone shows very bright on bone scans which is a false positive. A bit confusing.

Feeling good otherwise. A bit tired but who couldn't use a good nap most days.

Next up is a muga scan next week to check my heart.

Have a great weekend.

Carolin

Update

I saw the neck doctor today who gave me the thumbs up for most things except running. Maybe if I said I wanted to do motocross he'd say no to that and ease up on the running. I'll ask when I see him in 8 weeks.

The good doc took advantage of the 120 bone density pictures to get a good look at my neck. It also let me hear a quick overview of what the bone density scans had found. The shadows are still there in c3 and c6 of my spine. I've heard these are voids left by dead tumours. What's new was a similar shadow in my hip. Another dead tumour? This doc didn't know as he's more a surgeon. I'm guessing it is or I'd have had another phone call. They aren't shy about calling me in.

Bone Scan

I had a scheduled bone scan this morning. I left the house at 7:30 am to be at the hospital for 8:00 am. They injected me with the usual radioactive dye. Then I had 2 hours to wander around the hospital while the dye was absorbed into my bones. The first scan was at 10:30 am. That took 1/2 an hour. Then they asked me to hang around while the radiologist looked at the results. Then they took me to another machine to take some more detailed pictures of my neck. Another 1/2 an hour scan. Back to the waiting room. Then they said that they needed still more scans. I waited 1/2 an hour and then they sent me to yet another machine. This machine had 3 scanners and took 120 pictures in 1/2 an hour. So close to 1 pm I left the hospital.

Too many scans to be looking for nothing!! Will wait to hear the results. Nothing much surprises me anymore. But I'm not down - we will just do whatever comes next. Chin up!!

Bye for now.

I can give up my hospital parking pass

The doctor says that the last body scan showed significant reductions in the liver tumours, recovery from the lung damage that the chemo had caused, and no new surprises. The neck bones are regenerating (but won't make it back to 100%) and the fancy brain radiation/surgery MUST have worked. They'll check to see how that tumour is shrinking (see? positive thinking!) on April 5.

The summary? No chemo until another tumour shows up (hopefully never)! I only have the every-3-week herceptin intravenous, and a couple of daily pills to eliminate estrogen. Pretty easy, I'd say!!

So it's all good news. You might as well say the cancer's gone and all the rest of this stuff is to make it hard for the stuff to come back. Now what to do with the free time.....

Back in the driver's seat

I went to see my neck doctor on Friday. He didn't do x-rays this time. I get to start weaning myself from my neck brace. I can drive and go to the gym but still no running or skiing. One thing at a time he says. So I take my brace off for a bit of time a few times a day. It is feeling good. Mobility is coming back quite quickly. And did I mention that I can drive!!

Monday and today I went to the gym. 30 minutes of walking on the treadmill and some weights. Doc says no lifting weight over my head (eg. shoulder press). But it is great to be back. I have lots of energy and it is so nice to see my friends.

Tomorrow it is back to the oncologist. Now I will find out if we are doing chemo again or not.

I am on the mend. Hurray!!

Feeling Better

I am feeling better this morning. I think what I had on Monday was the 24 hr flu. I was sick all night. Yesterday was a little better. A friend from my support group brought over supper and sugested that we go for a walk. It felt great to get outside (even in the very strong chinook winds).

This morning I am feeling pretty normal. Again I went walking this morning with another of my friends. I think it is better to kick start my day with a refreshing walk rather than spend the day in my PJ's (which I have done for the last few days).

So I am out of the gutter and back on the sidewalk.

Thanks for all your care and concern.

Love Carolin

Hitting bottom

Well tonight I hit bottom emotionally, cried and told Sandy how tired I am of being sick. This was after a day of throwing up everytime I ate. Maybe it is the flu and maybe it is a sign of swelling in the brain. Neither of them do I want right now.
If they put me back on steroids for brain inflamation it would be for 5 days and then it takes 2 months to get me weaned off of them. That means 2 months of being fat again.
Yuck!

But after I brushed my teeth and wiped my tears it is back to being a fighter again and not giving into this hole I seem to be in right now. I know that I can drive and go to the gym again soon. And I know that there will be an end to treatments too - hopefully because I am healthy and not for the other reason.

I am not on any meds for head pain after Thursday's treatment.
I am very, very tired. I sleep almost 12 hours at night and then sleep another 3 hours during the day. The ladies from my support group did an amazing job filling my fridge and freezer with meals for the weekend and probably this whole week. Thank you so much!!

So I am off to bed soon. Jessica seems to tuck me in more often lately than I do her. She is such a resilant kid!!! She gives me lots of hugs and always tries to do things to help me. Sandy well what can I say... I married the best guy around. He comes home from work and then takes care of Jessica, cooks, handles the homework and walks Rylie. Not an easy job but he never complains.

Well time for me to sign off...

Love Carolin

PS Thanks again to everyone for the Emails, phone calls, prayers, love and support. Everyone always comments on my strength through this disease but I couldn't be strong without each and everyone of you behind me every step of the way. Like the 60 km walk it is just one step at a time!! Good night.

Pictures from a looong day

7 am and we were ready to go. First off they froze the four places on my head where they were going to bolt in the metal frame. The freezing came in 4 hypos that HURT! The tears were streaming down my face and we hadn't even started bolting things on.



These are the plastic bolts that go through the frame and into my head. Note the white ends. You won't see them on the outside of my head in any of the other pictures.




%

















Plastic helmut that they use to make sure everything is exactly lined up.


Me in the machine. I'm the one laying down.






The doctor is un-bolting me. This felt really weird as the pressure came off. Yes those are wrenches he's using.




Trying to give people an idea of the holes that are left. MAJOR headache!! Now I rest, treat the minor headache and watch for symptoms of too much brain swelling. If they show up it's steroids again. Booooo. I'm off to bed. Night night.



These photos may not stay up here too long because of the space they use.

Preparation for the Brain "Surgery"

I'm now up to speed with what to expect tomorrow. The most painful part happens right off the bat when they literally bolt a 3 pound metal frame to my skull. They use a wrench and 30 pounds of pressure! Then they do a CT scan to show the frame's position versus the tumor. Then 2 neurosurgeons and a physicist (as in a Phd in physics) spend 3-4 hours planning the machine's 6 minute operation. I'm the only one being treated for the entire day. This week a total of 3 will be treated. It's all very specialized. When it's done they unbolt me and I go home. The list of things to watch for is long but familiar. Brain swelling and I are old friends.

But I get to keep my hair, so it's not all bad. More after its all done.

Neck update

I still have my neck brace. I am only allowed to take it off for a few minutes and few times a day to do my exercises. I have a few exercises to do to build up the muscles in my neck. But I do get to sleep without it at night. Hurray!! I got NO to skiing, and NO to running and NO to driving. The driving part is a real downer. Actaully so is the skiing and running part. But I suppose they want to be cautious. So I go back to the neck doctor in 2 weeks and then maybe some limitations will be lifted. Busy week this week coming up.

Love Carolin

Things are happening fast

Yesterday I heard from the nurse in the tactical radiation department. This radiation procedure they use is focused and precise. It only radiates the tumor. There is a strict criteria to be a candidate for surgery dependant on the lesion size and number. Fortunatley I qualify. There will be no effect on my hair (of course I asked). They have a web site if you want to look:

www.albertaradiosurgery.ca

So the plan is as follows:

Friday 6th - I see my neck doctor (hopefully get rid of the neck brace) and get physio directions.
Tuesday 10th - I have an MRI of my head
Wednesday 11th - I have a consult with the Dr. doing the brain surgery
Thursday 12 -I get a CT scan and radiation surgery on my brain.
Friday 13th - avoid anything medical at least for today.
My last two chemo sessions have been cancelled. That's a change in plans but I need my white blood cell count up for this.

It is day surgery and I get to go home that night but I will need a week to recover. The nurse says to expect headaches, tiredness and some pain fron where the metal frame is attached to my head using pins. (Your life is too exciting if bolting a frame to your head only gets an off-hand mention.)

Will keep you posted as things start to happend.

Love

Carolin

It's always good to know what's going on

Even when the news is not what you want.

Today I went for a head to hip CAT scan. It would show how we were doing with the cancer. The radiologist hasn't had a chance to go over the results but my medical oncologist had an advance peak. The brain tumor is back. It's about the same size as it was when we started (2 cm x 2 cm). They hope to get me in for an MRI the end of this week or the beginning of next week. They also want me to start back on the steroids - I just finished losing 25 pounds, back in my skinny jeans and now back to the weight gain. That is a worse bummer than losing my hair - well maybe an equal bummer.

Turns out I'm a good candidate for the new surgery where targeted radiation is used instead of the whole-head approach we used last time. This is a one-time blast from lots of angles and requires a very specialized team. This oncologist guesses that they'll get into the act after the current chemo is done (about 2 more weeks). You'll recall that the chemo doesn't make it to the brain, so the reappearance of the brain tumour doesn't mean this chemo isn't working. It just means that I have more drama coming up in my life. Guess I can put the post-cancer hobby hunt on hold for awhile longer.

On a positive note my medical oncologist feels that my cancer in my liver is stable and in control. A few more chemo's to go.

Friday I see my neck doctor. Hopefuly I will get my neck brace off and get to start driving again soon. Jessica starts her activities next week and I would give anything to get back to the gym. Although it probably isn't wise to lift weights for a while I would still like to walk on the treadmill and see my friends.

Thank you for all the well wishes over the Christmas season - emails, cards and phone calls. With each new medical hurdle it is nice to have friends who are so concerned about me.

With love.

Carolin

Wrapping up 2005

Christmas in LA was all that I had hoped. It even managed to be white on Christmas day! (fog) Sandy's Dad and Mona looked after us well and everyone had a vacation that they'll remember for a long time. Thank you Jack and Mona!

The trip home brought a return to reality. I've got a neck brace on still until Jan 6. That'll be a red letter day for me even if I have physio to look forward to after that. While everyone has been great about driving me all over the place in the Christmas traffic, a girl needs her own wheels. Just to be safe, if you see me driving on Jan 7, don't hide in my blind spot.

This week I started a set of three more chemo treatments. My white blood cell count was well rested and today's treatment went off without a hitch. Next week I get a torso and head CT scan. That's a lot of laying still but it'll show how we're doing on the liver, and the head. I'm sure they'll show nothing and I'll have to get a hobby for 2006 to fill in my time!

Happy New Year to you all and we'll see you in 2006.

The neck bone's connected

On Friday I went to see the spinal surgeon. He works out of the "cast clinic" at the foothills hospital. He looked at my x-ray and pronounced it healing well. I just have to wear the neck brace another 3 weeks (!), then a little physio because I won't have any neck muscles still working, and my little neck episode is history. The doctor also said the "tumor load" was way down but that he wouldn't say it was gone (he's not a cancer doctor).

I am getting better at sleeping with this thing on. I guess you can get use to anything. Still no driving and its a little slippery for bikes. In three days we're headed for LA to visit Sandy's Dad. That's always fun and it'll be nice to worry about water going down my neck instead of snow.

Everybody have a merry Christmas and watch for slippery sidewalks!

Sore throat

One of the side effects of having neck radiation is a very sore throat. It showed up a few days ago but yesterday and today it is very painful. I cringe everytime I have to swallow. That is slowing me down on eatting or drinking anything. Christmas oranges are about the only thing I am willing to try right now because they kind of slip down on their own.

The doctor gave me a prescription for Lidocaine and Maalox that you mix together and swallow. Nasty, nasty stuff. I tried it last night and if froze my whole mouth so that I couldn't talk or eat so I went to bed at 5 pm and slept till 8 am this morning. Guess I needed the sleep.

No plans for the weekend. Hopefully get Jessica to the ski hill one day to enjoy the warm weather. A few Christmas presents to get still but that can wait until next week.

My love to you all.

Carolin

Last chemo session before Christmas

Friday is suppose to be my last chemo/herceptin session before Christmas. Once again the blood work shows that my white count isn't healthy enough to handle another dose of chemo. That means another missed opportunity to kill cancer cells with chemo. The doctor says we can start another round of three sessions on Dec 30. I had thought that we were finished but apparently not. The doctor isn't counting any of the original MMN chemo that they stopped because of the lung damage. More anti-cancer stuff? Who am I to argue?

Contrary to what my blood says, I feel great. My biggest complaint is the neck brace. It's darn hard to sleep in but apparently necessary to keep my head from falling off. Next week I'll see the neck surgeon so he can see if the neck bone is healing on its own. That'd be a nice Christmas present.

One week closer to Christmas

Well my sister left on Sunday morning and we had a productive week. In between doctor appointments we decorated the house for Christmas, cleaned my house, did Christmas shopping and had a visit from my dad. Not much of a vacation for my sister but she certainly knows how to get around Calgary as she was also my driver for the week.

Sandy's mom is staying with me now until Tuesday when Sandy comes home.

Thank you for all the phones calls I have received offering to give me rides. I really appreciate all the support and generousity especially since I know how busy this time of year is. This week things are covered. Karen drove me this morning and Sandy will be home for Thursday and Friday. Next week is quiet as we should have been on our cruise.

I shall call if I need help with rides or looking after Jessica. Thank you.

No news about my health. I am having trouble sleeping with this neck brace on. The good news is that I have no pain in my shoulder anymore.

Gotta run.

Love Carolin

Friday is finally here

It has been a very busy week since we were at the Tom Baker every day. I had radiation every day. Yesterday I had my blood test and my counts were good (2.3). Today we had chemo and radiation. My doctor has put on some pills to stimulate bone growth. 4 pills per day.

The appointment with the plastic surgeon was OK. We have decided that we may be optimistic with a Feb 10 surergy date because of my neck. He has some concerns because I will have to have a breathing tube inserted and that may depend on the healing of my neck. I said that I was comfortable postponing until Feb or early March.

Hope everyone has a nice weekend.

Love Carolin

Back to radiation

Our first stop this morning was at the Tom Baker radiation department in the simulator area. This is where they marked me for neck radiation. After that we saw the radiation oncologist. I am going to have 5 sessions on my neck. They will do it from each side. This is to get rid of any tumor as the bone will not grow and heal until the tumor is gone. I will still have chemo on Friday if my counts are good. The only side effects of this radiation should be a sore throat. The radiation area will include both C3 and C6. The doctor says that I will still likely require a plate to be inserted later.

After that we had about 2 hours to go shopping. My sister arrived yesterday from San Frnacisco to stay with me for a week. Certainly good timing since I can't drive.

At 2:00 pm I had my first radiation treatment. There is no messing around with things where Dr. McKinnon is concerned. He only received my file yesterday afternoon.

So there will be radiation Wed, Thurs, Fri and Mon. Lab work, medicial oncologist, and plastic surgeon on Thurs and Chemo on Fri. Not quite the vacation my sister may have been thinking of. Oh well whe gets a first hand look at a portion of my life right now.

Oh I forgot to tell you that I am scheduled for reconstructive surgery on Feb 10. Hurray!!

Bad news is that we have had to cancel our cruise. We are still going to LA for Christmas. We will be leaving on Dec 21st and returning Dec 28th. Hopefully we can get away on a vacation in Jan when my health issues settle down.

Bye for now.

Love C

Spine Doctor says ...

The MRI showed that the third vertebrae was fractured and there was shadowing in the 6th vertebrae both looking like cancer. The result was me spending more time laying flat and not moving. “Same vertebrae that Christopher Reeve broke,” I heard.

By Saturday afternoon I got a room out of the emergency ward. On Sunday I talked with the spine doctor. He filled in a lot of blanks. Most importantly he felt that the extreme measures to keep me stiff as a board and immobile were overkill. He said I could go home!! I just had to wear this very fashionable neck brace collar and avoid strenuous stuff. Driving is a no-no (something about only being able to see straight ahead). As for the bad bone in my neck he said that what people are seeing may be where a tumour had been before the chemo had destroyed it. The results had left a very weak bone that had broken. His preference wasn’t surgery. It was to wait and see how/if the bone healed on its own (4-6 weeks). At some point he said surgery would likely be needed as a preventative measure for future problems, but if the bone healed on its own, that surgery could be put off.

The radiation oncologist will look at things tomorrow and decide if he wants to radiate my neck. We’ll see what he says and also ask how that would affect the bone healing on its own.
So I am on my way home and will know more tomorrow after the radiologist and spine surgeon consult.

Some bad news

The neck xrays looked suspicious. The CT scan confirmed that the cancer has shown up in the neck bones. The third vertabrae from the top has dissolved. The sixth from the top has a spot on it. The reason for my extended sore neck is now clear.

They are taking it very seriously. I'm in a neck brace and not allowed to move AT ALL. No food or water (choking hazards). I'm checked into the Foothills Hospital and may be there awhile. Saturday morning they will do an MRI to determine how many vertabrae have cancer. They need to know because when they put a plate in my neck to stabilize it they want to bolt onto strong bones, not ones that are going to dissolve. There is also talk of radiation therapy before the neck stabilization which would greatly extend my hospital stay because despite my running around for 5 weeks like a regular person, one bad bump can turn me into a quadrapeligic. (Guess that shows I wasn't really pushing it at those body pump classes).

We talk to another neck doctor tomorrow. Stay tuned.

Back on track

After an extra week to recover from chemo, the count was good enough to get my chemo. Now the dust has settled, I have chemo on Fridays and Herceptin on Mondays. Still it's better to be getting treatment than to be sitting at home.

Delayed again

I was at the Tom Baker at 8 am this morning to have my blood test done. At 9:30 am the nurse came to tell me that my white count was still at 1.1 and that I couldn't have chemo. Not good news.

As it was my prescription never made it to the pharmacy on Friday so I waited until 11:30 to have Herceptin.

We will do another blood test this Friday and hopefully my count will be up.

It is now 7 pm and I am tired, depressed, frustrated and not in the mood to write.

Maybe tomorrow.

Bye for now. C

This week's chemo is delayed

Two weeks ago I was able to talk my way past a low blood count and still get the chemo. This week the doctor said "no" when the count was the same low number (1.1 instead of 1.5 minimum). We'll try another blood test on Monday and try to get the chemo in then.

It's getting close to the end of this round of chemo. If I can get three more in before the 10th of December, then I'm done with chemo. I'll still get the Herceptin every 3 weeks for 9 more months but that stuff is pretty easy to take.

A "crick" in my neck

It's not that I think that everything that happens to me is blog worthy. It's just that nothing much has happened lately (a good sign)so I thought I'd mention my neck.

Necks are important. They supply a great place to hang necklaces. They also seem necessary to turn your head. Mine does the first, but not the second. I hurt it opening a door about 2 weeks ago. The door wouldn't budge but I had the benefit of all those classes at the gym. I gritted my teeth and REALLY pulled. It opened. My head jerked. My neck hasn't been the same since. I've seen the chiropractor a couple of times, a doctor once, and used lots of heat, cold, massage and sleep. The end result is my neck still hurts and I can't turn my head. Handy if you're Frankenstein. Annoying in all other cases.

I may try a different chiropractor, or I may just take the doctor's muscle relaxants and sleep until spring. Either way, don't drive in my blind spot because shoulder checking when I change lanes is out of the question.

Chemo #3

This weeks treatments went a little quicker than usual. I only have to see the doctor before the Herceptin/chemo treatments and not before the "chemo only" treatments. If I don't have to see the doctor than I can have my blood drawn at the local labnear where I live and not at the Tom Baker. So that turned a 1 1/2 hr appointment into a 15 minute appointment.

Yesterday the nurse called me a 2:30 pm to give me my blood results. She said no chemo. I said "What!!". She said my neutrophils (a type of white blood cells) were too low. Mine are 1.1 and the bottom end of the range is 1.5. But I told her how good I was feeling. She said she would ask the doctor. At 5:00 pm he said as long as I was feeling good that we could go ahead.

So I will have to be extra careful for the next 10 days as not to catch anything. I am going into this chemo on a low point and it will only get lower. So no Superstore for me and lots of hand washing. And it is flu season as well.

So today my friend Colette and I went for chemo. The chemo wasn't ready because the order didn't make it to the pharmacy until this morning. So we got to go for coffee. We started chemo at 11 am and were done at 11:30 am. Nice and quick!

I had a nice nap when I got home and am feeling good right now. I am still not eatting much as my taste buds don't want to cooperate. But I am getting by. They see to be normalizing a bit but I don't want to get carried away with trying to many things yet. The Greek salad last night didn't get touched much.

I don't know if I wrote in the blog or not but about 3 weeks ago I pulled some muscles in my neck. They have been really sore and it hurts to shoulder check when driving, tipping my head back to drink and especially at night to turn over. I am seeing my chiropractor, having some massage therapy and taking some muscle relaxants when needed. So that is why I have not been at the gym the last few weeks. Thanks for all the Emails from my friends at WHC who have been concerned. I will be back as soon as I can. Worked out extra hard for me.

Well I hope that everyone has a nice weekend. I will take it easy and hope the neutrophils increase.

Love to everyone.

Carolin

Fiddling with little things

The chemo and Herceptin last week went fine, however Friday night I got a bad pain in my left arm again - the side my port is on. The doctor had said that if it happened again I should get them to stop the chemo injection right away because the chemo could be getting out of the artery. But I don't remember him saying what to do if it happened 6 hours later! Two advil and an early bedtime seemed to be the answer as most of the pain was gone by the next morning.

With the new chemo I'm doing (instead of M-M-N chemo, I just get the N part of the drug cocktail now) I get injections every week. So today I was back in the doctor's office for the pre-chemo visit. He decided to do a dye check to make sure the port was still in the right artery. The answer came back "sort of". The exact end of the port is in a little branch off the main artery. When the drug goes it the port, it has to work out of this little sidetrack area to get to the rest of my body. The good news is that there's no leak so we're good to go for my regular chemo tomorrow. As for moving the port to where it is suppose to be, they'll leave that discussion for later. My arm pain 6 hours later? That's still unexplained.

So that is how I spent 5 hours on Thursday. And I wonder why I never get anything done on my to-do list.

So tomorrow its another bag of intravenous stuff that has a name so long they just call it N.

Hopefully all goes well.

Tests and test results

Hello. This morning was a busy morning. I had my Muga scan at 8 am this morning. 4 needle pokes and 1 1/2 hours later I was finished. The Muga scan monitors how well my heart is pumping. Damage can be done by Herceptin.

Then it was off to the lab for yet another needle poke. That would be number 5 in the same arm for those who are counting. I have an enormous bruise now.

I checked in to see my doctor and was informed that I had to go for another chest Xray. This was a surprise. So off to Xray we went (my friend Karen came with me today).

Then back to the doctor. And this is what we learned;

- the CT results show that my liver lesions are shrinking. That is really good news and it means the chemo is working.
- there are no lymphnodes in the axilla or clavical area that look suspicious
- there is no change in the Xray taken 3 weeks ago versus the one taken today. There is nothing new but there is still shadowing in the upper side of my left lung. He doesn't think it is pneumonia because I don't have any symptons. He thinks it may be from the chemo that I had 6 weeks ago. So we are changing my chemo regimen. I will only have the "N" of the "MMN" chemo that I have had so far. I will have it every week for 3 weeks and then have a week off. I will continue with the Herceptin as well. I will have 2 cycles and then have another CT the beginning of December to see if the "N" continues to shrink the lesions.

So that is good news. Tomorrow I start the new regimen of "N" and Herceptin.

That's everything off the top of my head. If I remember anything else I will add another post.

Thanks for everyone's concern about these test results. Good thoughts gave us good results.

Love Carolin

Waiting for results

Hi there!! Well the fatigue has started to go away. I can make it through the day without a nap. I do however go to bed early. I am back to going to the gym doing my weight classes. The nausea continues to bother me and eatting is a problem. I am starting to get use to drinking those meal supplement drinks.

The CT scan on Friday went fine. They were behind by about an hour which made the afternoon a bit long. I should hear some results this week.

We had a nice Thanksgiving but no turkey or ham for this girl. I was able to eat cabbage rolls and that made up for anything else that I couldn't have. This was the first Thanksgiving for me with no pumpkin pie. I guess I will have to make one when I am feeling better. And hopefully that will be soon.

Not much else to report.

I'll write again when I get my test results.

Love Carolin

Fatigue

I have found out what it feels like to have fatigue. I am sleeping 11 hours at night and waking up tired. The other day I only had enough energy to get Jessica off to school and then I was back in bed asleep for 3 hours. Got about 2 chores done and then slept again until Jessica got off the bus. It is very depressing for someone who usually has a day full of energy and gets a lot of things done in a day. I've decided that even though I don't like the taste of coffee right now, it may keep me awake until lunch time. I truly have to say that in the past I haven't been that compassionate to people who say they are fatigued. For that I am sorry, now that I know how it feels and how little you can do when it is hard to keep your eyes open. I have started taking vitamins pills again to see if that may help. I was cautioned about taking too may vitamins while my liver is being treated. Too may vitamins pills can be hard for the liver to process.

It is now 9:30 am and I'm not back in bed!!! I will go walk the dog and see if I can make it until after lunch before I lay down for a rest.

Tomorrow is my CT scan in the afternoon. I don't expect any results until the middle of next week. Then we should have answers about my lungs and whether the chemo for my liver is working or not.

Keep you posted as I have new information.

Happy Thanksgiving to everyone.

Love Carolin